Pooping Sandcastles

If the heading doesn’t give it away then I will warn you that the main topic of this post is poo. And just for further clarity we are of course talking about baby poo. For those of a queasy disposition then do not read on any further. Don’t say I didn’t warn you!   Note:  You will however miss quite a funny – even though I say so myself – true story.

We have gone to Cornwall – more specifically Polzeath – on camping holidays for the last 10 years.  It is like a home from home for us. This camping holiday had particular significance as it would be the first time we would be going with Harry.  After unpacking and making ourselves at home, our first stop was of course, the beach. Lots of preparation went in to ensuring I had packed the sun-tent, the UV suit, the factor 50, wipes, toys, snacks, Pooping Sandcastlesfluid, sun hat, towels and the picnic blanket. I actually felt quite smug as we sat down to chill out and relax. However, what I hadn’t accounted for was the sand…..to be more precise how tasty my son found the sand. He scooped it up in handfuls! I thought “he will taste it 046 and that will be that”, but oh no…he was obsessed by it. I spent the next hour or so trying to stop him from eating most of the beach.  Frustrated that my relaxing sunbathing day had not materialised, I packed everything away and we made tracks to leave.

Now Harry has always been a smiley baby and so I wasn’t that surprised to see people looking at him in the buggy as we made our way to the road.  But what did confuse me was their reaction, it was one I hadn’t experienced before.  Odd I thought, so I looked over the top of the buggy and spotted brown runny liquid on the seat by my son. “Oh Chocolate” I thought. “I must have left some on the seat”. As I bent over to try and locate the melted bar, the smell hit me. What went in was obviously coming back out. The sand had acted as a DIY fast-acting colonic irrigation!

Trying to juggle a pram, small child and belongings off a beach is difficult at the best of times.  Yet a Herculian effort meant we were off the beach and back at the caravan in record time.  Child was extracted from seat, stripped down and carried over to the communal showers by a hysterical crying mother in the blink of an eye.  The new buggy – oh yes did I mention it was new – was left with my husband to sort out.  I wanted to set fire to it but then I was a little emotional and therefore completely irrational at the time.

As we sat down that evening both physically and emotionally scarred by the experience, the only thing that helped ease our suffering was drinking copious amounts of wine.  This was Day 1 of our holiday.  We had another 9 to go.  How do you go 9 days on a beach holiday avoiding the beach??  We needed to have a plan, and through my tears and drunken haze I saw the solution.  Hey Presto the toy basket that I brought became the Pooping sandcastlesbeach cage play pen.  It didn’t completely stop him but it certainly made it more difficult, and it made Mummy a lot more relaxed knowing that the horrors of the previous day were not about to be repeated.  The smile on his face in this picture was a mirror image of my own.

What might surprise you though – because it did me – is that for a couple of days afterwards what was left in his system came out very firm with quite a sandy texture.  He was quite literally pooping sandcastles.

We are one year on now, and in a couple of weeks time we are off in the caravan back down the coast.  I have my fingers crossed that last years sand experiment was just a phase.  As part of our holiday planning we got our cheeky little monkey a sand and water table for the garden, and as yet he hasn’t tucked in to it.  I hope he is cured as I can’t afford another new buggy, we don’t have a basket big enough to contain him, and there is not enough wine in Cornwall to help me get over it for a second time!

Love

Harry’s Honest Mummy x

42 thoughts on “Pooping Sandcastles

  1. Thanks for making me laugh! My youngest is 3 and no longer a sand eater. Good luck with this years holiday

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  2. I’m crying with laughter and cringing in equal measure.

    We’ve practically given up on any sort of beach holiday with two toddlers, because it’s just more hassle than it’s worth!

    until I can sunbathe and read a book in peace, I think we’ll stick to holidays at home where everything is within our control.

    Thanks for linking up with #wineandboobs
    @twentyfirstmama

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  3. Oh what a story! Thanks for sharing the laughs (and tears). A blowout is never fun, but of course the babies end up having them when you’re out in public and clean up is not at all easy.

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  4. I wish you the best of luck in your forthcoming holiday and avoiding poop castles! thanks so much for linking up with #MyFavouritePost

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  5. I wish you the best of luck for your forthcoming holiday in avoiding poop sandcastles! thanks so much for linking up with #MyFavouritePost

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  6. Hahaha!! Oh blimey!!! Our boys haven’t been on a bucket and spade holiday yet; the only time we’ve been to the beach with them is in the winter!! This kind of story fills me with dread — particularly as they’ve taken to ‘drinking’ all the water in their paddling pool!! LOL! I can just imagine them ‘eating’ all the sand on the beach too!! Thanks so much for linking up with #TwinklyTuesday — hope to see you again next week! x

    Caro | http://www.thetwinklediaries.co.uk

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  7. That’s one of the funniest things I’ve read for ages. How much Fabreeze did you use on the buggy.

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    1. Hahaha where is a can when you need one. Fairy liquid, anti-bac and some good old elbow grease did the trick I believe – and that was just on the child!

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  8. Back again from #myfavouritepost
    Debbie
    http://www.myrandommusings.blogspot.com

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  9. Argh do you know this happened to my dog once so I can totally relate, although obvs worse with a baby. Who knew that sand could have such an affect prior? Not me. Thanks for linking to #wineandboobs

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  10. Off to the beach in a week….going to pack some extra wipes now

    #wineandboobs

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  11. LOL that is one of the best posts I have read in weeks, fantastic! Great title and soooo funny! We never experienced this problem with my son, but I am so loving re-living your experience!

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  12. LOL. Love this post. My son had a sand poop too last week and he’s 6. We used to take a travel
    Cot to the beach and shove him in it. Seriously! #wineandboobs

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  13. Oh dear! My girls won’t touch sand – they get very upset if it is on their hands! I’m now very glad about this! Love the toybasket/beach cage!

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  14. Pingback: #momsterslink #9 July 3, 2014 | Domesticated Momster
  15. Ha a sand certainly gets everywhere, living in Devon we are so used to the beach that I have just learnt to deal with the sand but then I don’t think Josh ever ate any. Hopefully he’s old enough not to this time enjoy your holiday x x

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  16. Ahh bless you what an experience and we just went to spain with friends and her little girl constantly ate sand. I can’t imagine dealing with that and a new stroller, poor you on day one. Glad you had wine. lol Good luck this year. Thank you so much for linking up to Share With Me #sharewithme

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  17. hahaha i know i shouldn’t laugh but I love that line that he was quite literally pooping sandcastles. Oh no about the new pram though. Hopefully he’ll grow out of eating sand. xx

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  18. bahahaha! Sorry this made me laugh! Bless you all and thank god for wine. How stressful. Fingers crossed the sand eating phase is over!! Thanks so much for linking up to #bestandworst and please pop back xx

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  19. Haha ohh nooo this kind of thing used to happen to me when out with my son, we had several poonami’s and vomiting in the most unwanted of places! Great post and title and thanks for linking it up to the #bestandworst

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  20. Oh what fun times we parents have with POOP💩 it’s all fun and games until someone shits their pants right? Great story and I would have just left that stroller where it lay in the parking lot…full of poo😀 thanks for linking up with me at #momsterslink.

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  21. Oh this did make me giggle, babies just eat everything don’t they!! Good luck with your forthcoming trip, hope theres no poo explosions #momsterslink

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  22. Oh that made me laugh! I feel your pain, there’s nothing worse than poop leakage. Emma once leaked poop in the car on the M25 with no where to pull over. It was awful. But the mental image of his sandcastle poop is cracking me up! Hope you have better luck this time! x

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  23. I know it was probably horrendous at the time, but I definitely had a good giggle reading this! #momsterslink
    Debbie
    http://www.myrandommusings.blogspot.com

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  24. I loved reading this post and I’m sorry to say it made me lol. You wrote it so well that it was hilarious – for me not for you obviously!😉 Good luck for this year. Maybe stick a towel on the seat of the buggy for him to sit on just in case😉
    #bestandworst

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  25. That purple toy basket/cage idea is genius!! My kids are 2 and 3 now, but both ate plenty of sand in their first 18 months or so (we’re in Australia so there’s a LOT of sand here!!). I’m going to suggest that to some of my pregnant friends!!

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  26. Oh no! They really do have a sense of timing – am very glad that my daughter (having also tried to eat sand) decided she didn’t fancy any more… #bestandworst

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  27. That is so funny! Not for you obviously😦 Coincidentally we have just been to polzeath on our holidays but we didn’t stay there. Latest post for full details!

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    1. Thank you. Love love love it there. Spent more time on Daymer Bay last year as the water is shallower and not so much of a pull in. Great for kids but no body boarding for me. And of course pop to Padstow for Rick Steins fish and chips will pop on over to yours now. Hope you had a good time….

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  28. Oh. Dear. Lord. I actually said an out-loud ‘f***ing hell’ reading that. I got a real sense of your hysteria and desperation reading that. Thank heavens for the plastic purple cage/playpen. ‘All hail the purple cage for saving the beach holiday!’

    I hope the buggy didn’t perish in flames…

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